June 2011
5 posts
Weddings
Ange and I are in the car and I tell her that if her wedding is open bar, I will definitely be there.
Her response: “If you aren’t at that wedding, you’ll be dead.”
amazonangel:
“I really have to stop doing heroin.”
— Padre
Before this, she texted me to ask how to spell heroin, to which my response was: “Why do you need to spell it? Does your drug dealer want your order?”
tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST HUMAN MEMORY?
“…are you still petting the unicorns?”
– Amy
It always comes down to the rainbows and unicorns...
Me, through twitter: "There's a bug or frog outside that is legitimately one of the loudest things I've heard in nature. #shutup #soannoying"
(The rest is through texting) Angela: "I am way louder and you know it! Don't you ever disgrace me like that ever again!"
Me: "Shut up. You don't live in nature, you live in a house, therefore you weren't even included in this comparison."
Angela: "Lol damnit! I am nature!"
Me: "Are you high? You're not nature..."
Angela: "Haha no I'm not high! Rainbows and unicorns!"